Holy shit, we are reaching a new height; I'm officially turning 31 today. Yikes.
I can't believe we are in this chapter already. Time does not want to slow down, not even a bit. Oh God, wow... I age up. It doesn't feel like it, though. I don't feel it in myself that I'm in my 30s, do you know what I mean? The essence of it is just nonexistence. My whole being is refusing that I am getting old.
Hmpfh...
Sejauh rentang dekapmu, sejauh itu pula kudorong segenap hati ini makin dekat ke tepi. Berlomba adu pandang dengan jurang di bawah sana. Ramah genggam tanganmu menggoda dinding angkuhku untuk luruh tak bersisa, tameng terakhirku untuk menahan seutas kalimat yang sudah menggantung di ujung lidah.
Lalu kau bawa kedua bibir itu untuk bertamu dalam sebuah kecup. Aku mengedip, dan jatuh sebebas-bebasnya.
30 Maret 2021.
Lalu obrolan kita berlanjut ke topik yang lebih personal, atau istilahnya "curhat".
We often walked in the uncharted path. Unknowingly wandered into an uncertain future where thousands of outcomes may occur. It’s frightening, and yet, we keep on walking anyway.
Perhaps the thought of stopping altogether is scarier, and we might gradually cease to exist if we stop walking. But then, there are too many intersections. How do we know which one to choose? How do we know which track will not lead us to the bottomless pit of dark abyss?
Thus, we keep marching towards the foreign land with uneasiness clung tightly on our shoulders, hoping we might find the answer ahead.
Well, hello, earthlings! How are we doing today? How's the weather? I hope you all are doing fantastic.
As I have said in the previous post, I am now married (what????) and currently living in one of the best cities in the world, Sydney, Australia. Not only that, I had leveled up to the golden age of thirty. I feel like so many things have happened all at once, and I haven't been able to share with you, dear readers, all of this story.
Dear readers, we are now entering a new chapter of my life. A chapter where I hope I can get wiser as I get older, happier, and more content with life. This is definitely going to be a hell of a ride, but I am hoping that I can overcome any obstacles, any bump in the road, any edge of a cliff that I might face later.
When we ended things with someone whose name was once carved in every inch of our hearts, we realized that our entire routine must be reset because that person will no longer be in it. Who once was in the penthouse of our priority now becomes a stranger, just like when we first met them.
I'd be lying if I said that post-fire life is easily managed. No, it's not because today you look fine as usual, but the next day you have all these scars all over your body. My life and my body changed overnight. I had to say goodbye to my old life and entered this excruciating path I must endure.
Whew... what a year, isn't it? Does everyone get hammered by 2022? Because I did.
To put it nicely, 2022 was one of those impossible years that I had. But, to put it blatantly, 2022 was a fucking shitshow full of misery. It was a perfect hurricane of everything going wrong. That's 2022 for me.
However, let's start with the bright side first. Later on, the recap will get more depressing.
